Ducati Panigale V2 Awarded: ‘Best $13,000 Sportbike To Cost $20,000 Somehow’
Ducati Panigale V2 Awarded: ‘Best $13,000 Sportbike To Cost $20,000 Somehow’
BOLOGNA, ITALY – In a historic moment that only people who bought one new will never forget, Ducati’s Panigale V2 has officially taken home the coveted title of ‘The Best $13,000 Sportbike To Somehow Cost $20,000 Before Freight.’
Judges unanimously agreed that the 890cc twin delivers the spirited performance, modest peak power, and accessible chassis dynamics of a reasonably priced upper-middleweight, while simultaneously channeling the crippling monthly financing payment of many top-of-the-range superbikes.
“It really is the complete package,” said the lead evaluator. “Usually, $20,000 on a sportbike gets you terrifying speed. Ducati has revolutionized the market by keeping all of the fear firmly on your wallet, while the rest of you can just enjoy a reasonably-powered machine. After all, fear is just pennies leaving the bank.”
Ducati has confirmed that V2 owners who pay nearly the same amount for a base V4 will get to experience something V4 owners will never know the disappointment in strangers’ voices when they ask, ‘Is that a V4?!” just to hear you say, “Nah, it’s a 20k V2”
“We call it our ‘all of the flash, none of the pass’ initiative,” said a Ducati spokesperson. “You can still feel better knowing that you’re in more debt that others, but now you have an excuse when you’re unable to pass an SV650 on track. The things we do for our customers out of the kindness of our hearts…”
“We call it our ‘all of the flash, none of the pass’ initiative. You can still feel better knowing that you’re in more debt that others, but now you have an excuse when you’re unable to pass an SV650 on track. The things we do for our customers out of the kindness of our hearts…”
