KNOXVILLE, TENNESSEE -- A man was found dead in his driveway after allegedly removing the warning stickers from his motorcycle’s gas tank and swing arm.
“We found the victim around 7 pm yesterday evening,” said Gary Anderson, Sheriff of the Knoxville Police Department. “The victim still had a can of PBR in his hand.”
In addition the body and beer, officers also found an open bottle of Goo Gone, a razor scraper, and a laptop which had “How to remove stupid a** stickers on motorcycle” typed into a YouTube search bar. The victim also had tiny bits of sticker under his fingernails -- leading police to believe the cause of death was warning sticker removal. “It’s a crying shame,” said Sheriff Anderson. “Everyone should know by now that those warning stickers have an extremely important purpose that I can’t go into right now, and to remove them is practically suicide. It clearly says so somewhere in the manual.”
Police and motorcycle manufacturers across the globe are encouraging bikers to use common sense and to not touch these stickers under any circumstances.
“We could go on for hours about why those warning stickers are so crucial to your safety and wellbeing, but that would take days.”