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Divorce Rates Down 200% After RevZilla Launches Discreet Packaging Option

A new, discreet packaging option from RevZilla is believed to be behind a recent 200% drop in divorce rates among motorcycle enthusiasts.

The new packaging option – termed RegZill – clearly states that the package contains “Just Your REGular, Everyday Stuff.”

“We pride ourselves on offering protective gear to motorcyclists to keep them safe from all types of dangers they may face,” said one exec from RevZilla. “But after all these years, we realized we’ve been neglecting the greatest threat to any motorcyclist in a long-term relationship… their partner witnessing the arrival of a third RevZilla package in a week.”

Until this point, a motorcyclist’s safety directly correlated with how well he/she was able to justify spending $1,500 on a helmet because it weighs 0.4 ounces less than the $300 version from the same manufacturer.

Already this new direction is proving far more effective than RevZilla’s previous, desperate attempt to appease spouses: Wine vouchers.

“We calculated that it would take roughly 9 bottles of wine for a spouse to forget that their partner spent this month’s rent on an exhaust. Unfortunately, by the time the wine was shipped and delivered, the motorcyclist usually had already had two more fights over the Power Commander and air filter they purchased to go with the new exhaust.”

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